Desiré Writes

The United State of Women Galvanize Ohio event was amazing! The two day summit featured 500 passionate, inspiring women (and at least one inspiring man!) from across the state talking about everything from the Power of Social Entrepreneurship, Giving Voice to Our Girls, and Generational Differences. Some of the trailblazers included women like Congresswoman Joyce Beatty, Dr. Wendy Smooth, Shannon Isom, Jenn Brown, Columbus First Lady Shannon Ginther, and SO many more!

I encourage you to watch the entire video (the video in its entirety is at the bottom of this post), but if you’re short on time, catch me and Sen. Charleta Tavares during the keynote in two parts in the videos immediately below #StateOfWomen #GalvanizeOhio

Keynote Conversation | Part One:

Keynote Conversation | Part Two:

Full video:

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This week, the Women’s Fund of the greater Cincinnati Foundation is celebrating Mother’s Day via the #Likeamom campaign. So Leadership Council members, friends and supporters of the Women’s Fund are honoring folks who are or who have been like a mom in their lives via donations and/or social media shout outs.

When you think about a “mom” typically you’d think someone who has encouraged you, inspired you, given advice, been there when you need them, told you about yourself when you thought you didn’t need anyone, helped you in some way either by getting you out of a pickle or stopping you from getting yourself into one.

This list could go on and on.

Also, being like a mom isn’t necessarily gendered. My brother has been like a mom to me in the past by helping me out and watching his nephew (my son) when he was little. My grandpa has been like a mom for me by always being there when I need/ed him.

My fabulous grandpa and amazing brother

And that person doesn’t necessarily need to be older than you to be like a mom. My younger sisters fall into this category. They’ve been #likeamom to me in that they’ve shown me what it’s like to be fearless (in varied ways). My older sister has, too!

When I first learned about this campaign I realized it would be a bit difficult for me not to go overboard with posts and shouts-outs because

1. My muchness and
2. There have been so many people who have been #likeamom to me throughout the years.

There’s really not enough time or space (or days in this week!) for me to honor you all–and some of you I’ve thanked in a previous work-in-progress post (click here to see that).

Who has been like a mom to you? If you feel so inclined, please share in the comments below. Better yet, post it to your social media using #likeamom and tag @cincywomensfund

To donate to the Women’s Fund in honor of this campaign, click here.

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Earlier this week,  a friend of mine posted the image below. I was scrolling through my Instagram feed while standing in line by myself, and when I saw it, I actually laughed out loud. I couldn’t help myself because, although I’m not falling apart or crazed like Cruella de Vil [not today, anyway ha!], I know what’s it’s like to juggle all of the things [and more!] mentioned in this tongue-in-cheek meme.

And keep up on my blog posts!

The past two weeks of my life included birthday celebration(s), the final touches of planning and executing a fairly large-scale event, and a whole bunch of other things (which I’ll maybe write about at a later date. One of which includes the release of a study on the gender wage gap that exists in Cincinnati)—and they flew by before I even realized it.

That event I mentioned was the YWCA annual Stand Against Racism. This year’s theme was Women of Color (#WOC) Leading Change. Check out this post, if you’re wondering “why women of color?” During the event, we highlighted and elevated the voices of local, dynamic #WOC leading change in the Cincinnati area.

When I tell you a miracle happened that day–I’m not being hyperbolic. Let me give you a little background. We scheduled it to take place in a public, outdoor area in Downtown Cincinnati called Fountain Square. Which is awesome–unless there’s inclement weather. And there’s really no way of knowing, particularly when you book the space months in advance. So earlier this week, I’m checking the forecast and it calls for FIRE AND BRIMSTONE [well…it called for heavy rain and thunderstorms, which might as well have been fire and brimstone when you’ve got the success of an upcoming outdoor event depending on the weather outcome].

Please tell me why there was rain and ominous storm clouds all morning until the moment we started setting up on the square when THE SUN CAME OUT and stayed out during the entire two-hour event. And, get this—thee moment we thanked folks for attending, the sky opened up and it started raining sideways.

Check out the awesome evidence below.

As Tweeter (is that a thing? if not, I’m making it a thing) @lukeblocher put it: “Like a morning we can surely hope for, the skies clear just in time for the #StandAgainstRacism

The skies didn’t just clear, the event was sandwiched between heavy downpours and not even a hint that the sun would come out for the entire event. It was pretty awesome.

MAINTAINING PATIENCE

Other things that also happened this week may give you an idea of why I laughed at the meme (above) I began this blog post with. Some of the teachers at my daughter’s school are working my nerves. Case in point, a few days ago, my daughter says to me “I can’t get sick because I can’t go to the nurse.” Let me provide you with some background.

My daughter’s birthday was also this past week. Tuesday was the big day and she talked her grandpa into taking her to Starbucks that morning before school (I’m hoping it was a decaffeinated beverage, but I’ll never know. I’m pretty sure it contained sugar, though). So by the time classes were about to start, she had a really bad headache. When the bell rang, instead of going straight to her first class (orchestra/violin) she heads to the nurse’s office. The nurse tells her to drink some water and go to class. My daughter goes to her class and the teacher tells her he is going to write her up for skipping class (she was TWO MINUTES late, btw) because she doesn’t have a note from the nurse. My daughter goes back to the nurse to get a note, but she won’t give one to her.

At this point, my daughter starts panicking. She doesn’t skip class or do things to defy teachers/authority at school and she doesn’t understand why they’re doing this. So she calls me and she’s really upset because she thinks she’s going to get in trouble for “skipping class.”  When I call the nurse, she says, “It’s not my policy to write a note for a student if they didn’t have permission from their teacher to come see me.”

Although I’m thinking “Oh. Okay. But it IS your policy to send the incorrect student on a trip to an offsite clinic to be screened for something without receiving permission from her parent which is what happened to my daughter when this same nurse incorrectly told her to go and get on a bus in the middle of the school day once—but THAT is a story for another day).  

Instead, I express to her that this isn’t something that my daughter is making up—and that I would tell her she had to live with the consequences of her actions, if she’d done something wrong. The nurse reluctantly says she’ll call the teacher and attempt to straighten things out, but in the same breath says that she doesn’t think he’ll budge. Thankfully, the office administrator who witnessed my daughter stopping at the nurse’s office writes her a note.

Just two days later, my daughter’s math teacher wouldn’t allow my daughter to leave her classroom to use the restroom, telling her that she could go but she’d receive a lunch detention the following day [ummmm...excuse me?]. I now have a decision to make. Confront her (not a hostile confrontation, but a confrontation from a parent who thinks that said actions are completely ridiculous) and risk said confrontation resulting in negative consequences toward my daughter (blatant or otherwise). Or maintain my calm and hope to ride the rest of this school year out without further incidents.

What would you do? Please comment below.

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Sundays mean different things for different people. For some, it is a day of worship. For others, it is a day of rest. For me, Sundays hold dual meaning. It’s a doorway from one week to the next. It’s a culmination of the week behind me and the week ahead. On Sunday morning, I’m grateful that there’s one more day in the weekend–(typically) it’s not quite time to get back to work (although I do use the evening to scan email and gauge the work week ahead), but I’m also aware that there’s a brand new week right in front of me, filled with a multitude of possibilities. Or roadblocks. Or opportunities. Or headaches. It all depends on how I look at it.  And when I choose to see it as a fresh start or as an opportunity for new and better things, it feels like Sunday is a gift.

#SMC

A couple Sundays from now will truly be a gift for my daughter. To understand why, let’s take a trip back in time to just about any of my childhood birthday parties (of which there were maybe four). There were no bouncy houses involved. Or waterparks. Or dozens of people. Or trips to beaches. There certainly wasn’t a week of activities. And can someone please tell me when we started celebrating birthdays for an entire week?

There seems to be a new trend now where we (as parents) go overboard (present company included). I want to know, how did this happen?

Every year I tell myself we will “super celebrate” the milestone birthdays. Moving into double digits (although, this is a bit of a stretch), becoming a teenager (even though, really, a party should be thrown for the parent(s) because they’ve got dealing with the teen years to ahead of them ha!), turning 16 (this is a pretty big deal), and becoming 18 (for obvious reasons).

Somewhere along the way, though, every single birthday begets a blowout bash. When did this trend begin? And, more specifically, how–even though I tell myself I’m not going to do it–does this keep happening?

The answer may lie in how difficult my pregnancy was for me. And by difficult, I mean hospitalization nearly every week for the first three months. Remember a few years ago when duchess Kate Middleton was pregnant and had a condition called hyperemisis gravidarum? Well, I had the same condition. Only worse. It was so bad that I ended up having a PICC line inserted into my arm and up near my heart so that I could connect myself to an IV bag each night. This was so I wouldn’t become severely dehydrated from the constant vomiting that ensued almost every day during my pregnancy. Through my PICC line, I administered myself anti-nauseous meds and prenatal vitamins for nearly seven months.  I still have scars on my arm where the line was inserted.  It was quite the ordeal. And made for a really long nine months.

Where was I? Oh, yes. Two Sundays from now.

So instead of a simple day of just me and her going to do some fun activity (which I always say we’ll do), there’s now a rock climbing, zip lining, bunch-of-friends-from- school party planned. All of which I am the culprit.

But it is a gift. And so is she.

Any other parents out there experiencing this issue?

I’d like to take this moment to thank my five subscribers for being intrigued/supportive/curious enough to subscribe to my blog! You’re super cool and I appreciate you.

The hours have flown by since my last post. Since then, I’ve realized a few truths:

Truth #1: I get super excited about almost everything (this is known as my muchness)
Exhbit A: my overexcitement about someone jumping on a bungee cord Ha!

A little back story: Wednesday evening, I’m on my way to an event (which turned out to be a really great evening–it seemed like at least a couple of people, if not all, in my dialogue circle got a lot out of the process–and I promise I’m not saying this because I had something to do with putting the event together. The evening was very meaningful and I wish we could do more of them!) I helped coordinate and I see this guy (and others out of frame) jumping and doing flips on this line and I can’t help but to stop and record it. And include ridiculously awed commentary. I really think it’s (one of the) coolest things and I’d never seen it done before (I later found out it’s actually called slack linking).  But if you know me, you know all about my seeming inability to not be excited about something. It’s my muchness.

Truth #2: I’m not certain how to contain said muchness. There’s probably a time and a place to tone it down. Most days I am utterly oblivious to those times and places.

Truth #3: My muchness was in full effect when I said I would write a blog post every day. I’ve come to the realization that even though I can write every day, I may be reaching a bit expecting a coherent, put together post every day (as evidenced by this week) at least for now.

Speaking of this week, I’ve already mentioned one of the enlightening events that happened at UC. Another one was a National Crime Victims’ Week event that one of my co-workers put together. It featured the family members of crime victims. The courage and strength that these women have is miraculous. Even though they’ve lost loved ones–one of them lost multiple family members in a series of events–they are able to share their stories and work as advocates for victims’ rights. It’s incredible. Their resilience is a reminder to me that no matter what I’m going through, there’s a way to push through it. Here’s a photo of the event’s MC, News 5’s Tammy Mutasa, addressing attendees during the event.

Another event I attended this week was the Cincinnati USA Regional Chamber’s STIR! Multicultural networking reception. One of the cool things about the event was the “forced” networking exercise we all had to do. It would get cumbersome (and maybe a tad bit confusing!) if I tried to explain it, so instead, here’s a photo I snapped of the rules.

This was a really great idea–in theory. Bells one and two worked out wonderfully, Bell three was really fun because we were all just trying to “beat the buzzer.” But by Bell Four I think we were all confused about what it was we were supposed to be doing ha! There were just so many people by that round.

Truth is though, it was a lot of fun.

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